Life Without Woman!

no more re-adjusting your mirrors and seats every time you get in your car

toilet seat is already up after consuming 18-pack of beer

paper plates come in two choices - disposable and still usable

buddies, bar, buddies, chicks, bar buddies, home, beer, fart, sleep

porno flick can remain in the VCR

junk drawer actually holds junk

you can kill the cat

old beer cans do suffice as ash trays

all the laundry can be sorted and forcibly smashed down hard enough to submerge into just one load

no more doilies

toilet paper conveniently left on the floor for easy reach

it's perfectly acceptable to fart at the table

frilly, flowery shower curtains can be used to bury the carcass of her now dead cat

closet space

no more shrieking of your name when there is a spider nearby

buddies, bar, buddies, chicks, bar buddies, home, beer, fart, sleep

commercials with bikini-clad blondes selling long distance are, indeed, worth watching

no more cold toes between your thighs at 3:10 a.m.

dead cat's food bowl doubles as a urinal

housework can be done in one lap - bathroom, fridge, beer, couch

her drinks are no longer a major drain to your savings account

condoms proudly displayed in your wallet once again

~by Tigress Luv, the Breakup Guru

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